Ellie Black

Issue 52
Fall 2024

Ellie Black

Sodom, Styx, Gomorrah, Mississippi

I turn to you, I turn
to dust, to salt,

so the story goes,
to an empty patch

of air. Or you do
the turning—

where once was
you is now

not you, or simply
less you, the alchemized

lack of you, ashes scattered
thin across the whole

of space-time. Oops.
That upon which I lay eyes

disappears or unravels
entirely—everything

I begin to love. So I stop
beginning to love.

All the love is in the middle now,
suspended like a raindrop

hanging from a branch:
if you get close enough,

you can see everything reflected
upside-down. You know

eventually it’s going to fall
and you can’t stand to watch.

Be Not Afraid

An angel came into my room all like BE NOT AFRAID

The angel was in flickering black-and-white

or in Technicolor depending on the angle

The angel was a giant rabbit six foot three

or actually the angel was just some guy in a coat

The angel was like looking in a mirror

but only out of the corner of your eye at night

The angel said WE HAVE A LOT IN COMMON

The angel said I CAN SENSE

THE INTENSITY OF YOUR LONGING YOUR

LOVE THE WEIGHT OF YOUR DEVOTION NOT

TO GOD BUT HUMANITY DOESN’T

IT SUCK I said sure he said LOOK

WE HAVE THE SAME EYES and so

we did numerous and blue the angel said

I’M HERE FOR YOU I said okay but

as in I’m your friend or as in I’m here

to exhort you to abide by the will of God

and we both laughed I said fine

what’s God’s will for me then

He said through a thousandth

mouth I could not see: YOU MUST BE

VERY CAREFUL AND YOU MUST

BE KIND YOU MUST BE AFRAID

YOU MUST NEVER BE AFRAID YOU

MUST BE THE CONDUIT THROUGH WHICH THE WORLD

SEES ITSELF A MIRROR HELD INFINITELY UP

TO ITSELF EVERYONE WILL LOVE YOU NO ONE

WILL LOVE YOU LEARN TO ACCEPT THIS

YOU MUST BE DECORATIVE YOU MUST BE SUBSTANTIAL

YOU MUST BE HYPOTHETICAL YOU MUST BE

FOOLPROOF YOU MUST BE FOOLED YOU

MUST BE SORRY YOU MUST BE SORRY

YOU WILL ENGAGE IN MINOR FORMS

OF PROPHECY AND IT WILL NOT TURN OUT

WELL FOR YOU LEARN TO ACCEPT THIS

YOU WILL BE ARRAIGNED ON CHARGES

OF DESIRE YOU ARE NOT PERMITTED WANT

WANT IS ALL YOU WILL HAVE YOU MUST FORGIVE YOU

MUST NEVER BE FORGIVEN YOU MUST NOT DO

WHAT GOD HAS WILLED FOR YOU

EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH

WILL BE CHANGED AND FORGET YOU

YOU MUST DESTROY YOURSELF

YOU MUST ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE

DESTROYED IT IS FOR THE GOOD

OF MANKIND THAT YOU DO THIS

and I said where will you be

Will you stay with me

I said hello?